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You Are NOT a "Bad Mom" Because Your Child is in Childcare

Updated: Jul 20, 2020

To the moms who feel guilty because their children are in daycare,

I know you have felt guilt at least once for dropping your children off at daycare. The truth is that moms are shamed by some if they work and put their children in childcare, and they are shamed by others if they stay at home with their children.

So here are some things that I want you to know:

1. Speaking from my own experience, your children’s teachers at daycare love them more than you could ever even imagine! We have wiped their tears and changed their diapers. We have sang them songs and read them books that we have already sang and read a million times. We have helped them learn, helped them grow, and we love it. Sure, some days are stressful, but most days we wouldn’t trade the memories or days with your children for the world! We think about them when we are not with them, we pray for them when they need prayers and we miss them when they go off to school.

2. You are preparing your children for what is to come in the next few years. Kindergarten is such an important year of learning for your children and it is a huge change for most kids. With experience going to daycare, children are already used to being around other kids and being left while you are gone which makes the transition a little smoother for everyone.

3. They learn so much at daycare. From songs, second languages or baby signs, to how to socialize with other children and how to share, daycare improves many skills. When children see or hear other children talking, walking, potty training, etc. a lot of times they want to join in on the fun and do it, too! An extensive study by the U.S. National Institute of Health showed that children had higher cognitive and academic achievement scores as teens if they spent time in high-quality daycare as children.

4. The structure alone is a huge benefit. Your children have set meal and snack times, along with nap times. They also have gym and outdoor times, craft times, story time and circle time.

5. Finally, you are NOT a bad mom because your children are in daycare. Whether it’s because you are working, have appointments, or truly just need a few hours to yourself, you are NOT a bad mom for it! Sometimes your kids need or want a break from you, too! They want time with their friends, just like we do as adults.

They say it takes a village to raise a child, and if your “village” includes the teachers or caregivers at your daycare, you are not a “bad mom”! Give yourself a break, momma.

***I also want to include that I am in no way shaming mothers who stay at home with their children or have family members who babysit for them, I am just attempting to reassure the ones who feel guilty every time they drop their children off to daycare that they are not “bad moms.” Every family is different and every family does things differently… and that is perfectly fine!

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